I knew the comments and questions would come swiftly. I underestimated how quickly they’d come. After the birth of our second daughter, the question came before I even left the hospital. An orderly asked, “Are you going to try for the boy?” Many people would just dictate, “Better get started on trying for the boy!” Our first daughter was born in 2013, and we were (and still are) over the moon in love with her. In 2016, I was pregnant again, and like the first time around, we did not find out the sex of the baby. I have always felt there are too few great surprises in life and my husband agreed. We wanted the surprise and excitement of the doctor exclaiming, “It’s a ____!” We also honestly did not care if it was a boy or a girl. As cliché as it may sound, we just wanted a healthy baby.

Throughout my second pregnancy, we were asked, “What are you going to do if it’s another girl?” I understand that sometimes people are just trying to make conversation. Sometimes people are just curious and want to know, “Hey, are you going to try for the boy?” Sometimes, however, these questions come with a twinge of “Another girl isn’t enough.”

I get it. We are programmed to think the perfect family is one girl and one boy, a golden retriever and a white picket fence. I understand that boy moms are asked the same thing, “Are you going to try for the girl?” However, when you have two girls and do not try for the boy, there is an underlying current for many people that a girl or girls are not enough. This is especially true in a Hispanic culture that puts an incredible value on having a boy. For some, there is a sense of failure in having only girls.

My husband and I come from large Hispanic families. My husband comes from a family of two boys. My mother had my brother first followed by two girls. Having a boy to “carry on your name” is still a huge deal in many Hispanic families. And so, after the birth of my second daughter, the question of, “So when are you going to start trying for the boy?” came over and over but more so when we went to Miami to visit our family. We were thrilled to introduce our newest and second baby girl to our hometown families.

As the first night of our visit winded down, I went to bed early. Both girls were sound asleep, and I was exhausted. My husband stayed up to spend some time with his extended family that was in town. He was inevitably asked, “You’re going to try for the boy right?” My husband said, “No, we’re good with the two girls.” The reply back was immediate. “That’s like going to bat and fouling out both times!”  My husband was taken aback. He was so grateful to have two healthy children and a wife survive both pregnancies (more on that later), that he was simply floored at the comment. It’s about time we changed the commentary.

Let’s change the narrative that girls are somehow, not enough. Let’s move away from, “You can’t have only girls. You need to try for the boy.” Let’s move away from, “Your husband probably really wants a boy and just doesn’t want to say it.” Let’s move away from, “Don’t you want a boy to play baseball with?”

Let’s move the narrative to, “You’re incredibly blessed to have not just one but two girls!” Let’s move the narrative to, “Girls are wonderful!” Let’s move the narrative to, “Your husband is so blessed to have two healthy children!” Let’s move the narrative to, “A girl! That is so awesome! You can play dolls AND baseball or softball with her!”

See how easy that was? This is not for those people that ask these questions or share their thoughts to make conversation. This is for all those people that think, “A girl isn’t enough.” This is for all those people that think my husband somehow, “Fouled out twice.”

For all the baby girls out there, I want to say, “A girl is enough.” For all the little girls out there with big dreams, I want to say, “A girl is enough.” For all the parents of only girls, I want to say, “A girl is enough.” When it comes to having children, it’s about time we say, “A girl is enough.”

To my daughters, I want to say, “You are enough. You’re both home runs. Don’t let anybody ever tell you otherwise.” 

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